Day 19: 34,504 Words, and the Celebrities are Supporting the Teachers!

Joining our group of resisters are more teachers (yes I am still adding new characters, including a politics teacher names LeRoy Butler) and some celebrity feuders: 

The Jeremy Roenick and Justin Bieber feud is a strange one, because one is an NHL hockey player (not technically a celebrity) and one is a pop star (a legit celebrity). The origin of the feud is the celebrity hockey game “Skate for LA Strong”- the fundraising game that had brought together first responders, celebrities, and NHL Alumni to support relief efforts for the wildfires that had devastated greater Los Angeles in January 2025. It would have been even cooler if the game had been raising money for the various LA immigrant rights organizations that are resisting the activities of Immigration and Customs Enforcement, one of the other reasons that the Summer of ’25 was dubbed ‘Hot Commie Summer’, but hey. You can’t win ‘em all, as they say. I mean, technically the resistance hadn’t started at the time of the game, but it’s never a bad time to support immigrant rights organizations. So. Just saying.

It was unclear what had sparked the fight that broke out on the ice between Jeremy Roenick (who at 55, was still quite spry for his age) and 31-year old, Justin Bieber. It seemed ill-advised for Justin Bieber to poke the bear as it were. Although Roenick was 20 plus years his senior, he was still heavily favoured in the fight, and humiliated Bieber. This led to Bieber (a Millennial) posting taunts directed at the former NHLer on his Instagram page, which Roenick, as a Gen Xer, did not understand and though he had an account his children (Gen Zers) had started for him, he didn’t follow Justin Bieber on the ‘Gram. When Roenick’s children brought the taunts to his attention, he was incensed and demanded a rematch, which Bieber (quite rightly) had been dodging ever since.

Anyway. Also joining them were Dwayne ‘The Rock’ Johnson and Vin Diesel. Vin Diesel was the one sporting the “Celebrities Against Celebrity Feud Support Groups” t-shirt. This splinter group might have wanted to do a little bit more thinking about things before proceeding with their plan. Ultimately, donning the “Celebrities Against Celebrity Feud Support Groups” t-shirts kind of identified them as the less important or less celebrated member of the feud pairing. Almost like they were wearing “I was DUMPED by my celebrity feud partner and I am aggrieved shirts.” It was pretty embarrassing actually. 

When the teachers began to enter the room, they overheard a heated conversation between Dwayne ‘the Rock’ Johnson and Vin Diesel. The Rock was overheard saying, “Vin. We talked about this. You and I buried the hatchet years ago. Stop trying to revive your career by reviving this feud!” Vin Diesel looked aggrieved, which seemed to soften the Rock, who then put a hand on Vin Diesel’s shoulder and said, “next time, just tell me when you need help, buddy.” When they saw they were being observed, they quickly cleared their throats, plastered enormous grins on their faces, and introduced themselves to the star-struck teachers. Well, they were star struck by Dwayne “the Rock” Johnson, not Vin Diesel. They were sort of triggered by Justin Bieber (who had attended the infamous Game 7 meltdown of the Leafs in the second round playoff series against the Florida Panthers), and everyone loathed Jeremy Roenick, whether they knew him or not. Rounding out the celebrities were Sylvester “Sly” Stallone and Richard “Prince Fucking Charming” Gere. Strangely, they were both wearing “Celebrities Against Celebrity Feud Support Groups” t-shirts and matching pairs of jorts.

[a bunch of stuff happens, including performing a choreographed dance routine to Yeah by Usher (featuring Lil Jon and Ludacris) and servings of refreshments]

When everyone was settled in, they were reminded of what they were here to discuss by James “Beeker” Van Der Beek. He once again stood at the chart paper stand, flipped to a fresh page, and wrote down Books (??????). The celebrities had been brought up to speed on the actions of the administration, and were ready to support the teachers. The Celebrity Feud Support Group was now just a cover for the Teachers (and friends) Against Fascism Support Group.

“Pipe down, LeRoy, (or is it pike down?)” someone shouted when LeRoy Butler tried to give them the correct definition of fascism. “No one likes a know it all! Teachers Against Classic Liberalism just doesn’t have the same ring and we all know it.” LeRoy had to acknowledge the truth of that statement, and he grudgingly relented, taking a sip from his oily coffee and then immediately regretting it.

“As you will recall, Bam Bam said at our last meeting,” James began, flipping back through the flip chart notes, “that he had an idea for where we could get books for the students. But that it was dangerous and potentially illegal, and he wanted to explore the idea more thoroughly before bringing it to the group. Logan, are you ready to discuss your idea?”